Tea Baggers Media Guide

This is just funny stuff.

As many of you know, I have a profound respect for the Republican Tea Baggers. These are very serious, tough and patriotic people. How can you not support the impeachment of a very popular president and not be patriotic? Really, you have to be insane not to consider that patriotism.

I've longed lived to participate in their next Revolution, like the one in 1994 that paved the way for 8 years of George W. Bush and a permanent Republican Majority. I cannot think of anything more exciting than seeing the people who two weeks ago proposed a numberless budget to regain power in this country. It's a clever idea that without numbers you have no deficit and no fiscal irresponsibility-- everything is sunny just like in their make-believe world.

Thankfully we now have a Media Guide that should assist us all, media, bloggers and citizens of the world every where in deciphering just what is going to take place on April 15.

In case anyone has any questions, David Waldman has posted talking points to guide us all through what will be a ball slapping good time.

1. If nobody disrupts anything (the most likely scenario, since nobody has yet figured out why they would need to disrupt people who've decided to get together to wave teabags), the teabaggers would have you know that it wasn't disinterest that kept the event peaceful, but rather that their patriotic might scared the evildoers away.
2. If someone does show up and disrupt something, the teabaggers would have you know that evildoers want to "silence" them. Depending on how things develop from there, two possibilities present themselves:
3. If someone shows up and disrupts things and the teabaggers manage to subdue them, the teabaggers would have you know that the story is about how tough they are.
4. If someone shows up and disrupts things and the teabaggers find themselves overwhelmed, they'd have you know that the story is about what victims they are.
5. If someone shows up and reflects poorly on the event (i.e., neo-Nazis show up in uniform) and the teabaggers are afraid to do anything about it, they'd have you know that the neo-Nazis were really liberal plants.